Thin Ice
by pandora1017
Summary: Jay's near-death experience gives Adam the courage to share an important secret. *slashy, of course*


Title: "Thin Ice"  
Author: pandora1017  
Rating: PG-13  
Content: Slash. Of course.

Notes: Props to Amanda for the inspiration! This was based of an article where Edge and Christian spoke about an incident where Christian fell through the ice on a road trip once and Lance Storm's 'Death Tour' commentaries. I just made it slightly angstier. Oh, and slashier, but I like to think it happened this way.

Characters: [I own nothing. Nothing, I tell you.]  
Jay = Jason Reso = Christian  
Adam = Adam Copeland = Edge  
Terry = Terry Gerin = Rhyno  
Joe = Joe Hitchen = Just Joe/Joe E. Legend

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"Ninety five bottles of beer on the wall, ninety five bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around, ninety four bottles of beer on the wall! Ninety four bottles of beer on the wall, ninety four bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around, ninety three -"

"Jay, I _will_ throw you out of this van."

Jay crossed his arms over his chest and sneered at Terry. "Gotta pass the time somehow."

"If you don't stop singing, it's going to be with a sock in your mouth."

I laughed to myself, earning a dirty look from Jay, who I was wedged up against in the middle seat of the van. Terry was driving, Joe was shotgun, and the rest of the van was full of what meager luggage we brought with us and our beat up little ring. After all that, there was about four feet on the seat that it was my turn to share with Jay. Jay, being the nice guy he was, volunteered to sit in the back this trip, but I was beginning to think that would just be so he'd be out of Terry's arm reach. It's not that he was _trying_ to piss of a three hundred pound man who could most likely rip him limb from limb, he just had a number of habits that got on Terry's nerves. Especially when we were tired, irritable, and driving through the backwoods on Manitoba at four in the morning in a cramped van. I tried to shift slightly, but it was difficult in a space that could hardly fit Jay, much less Jay _and_ all six feet, four inches of me. Jay elbowed me.

"Dude, you're killing me here. Could you take up anymore of the seat? How about I just sit on your lap?"

"Well, I, uh..." I shrugged, thoughtfully. I _could_ use this opportunity to tell him that he was more than welcome on my lap anytime he was inclined to visit, or I could keep my mouth shut and not risk three large professional wrestlers bodily throwing me out of the van in the middle of nowhere in at least six inches of snow.

"I was joking, man, don't get your hopes up," Jay cracked. I jokingly grabbed him in a side headlock and ground my knuckles into his head. Noogies are manly, right? I'll let the boys know I'm gay later. Fortunately, Joe was half asleep, Terry was concentrating on driving, and Jay was in too much of a good mood to get suspicious. Wiggling from my grip, Jay grinned at me and forgot Terry's earlier warning. "All right, where was I? Ninety three? Ninety three bottles of beer on the wall, ninety three bottles of beer! Take one down -"

"_Shut up!_"

Jay stopped suddenly and blinked. He must have thought Joe was sleeping. I saw the first smile from Terry I'd seen all night, and grinned myself. Jay pouted again. "Spoilsport."

And so continued another of our infamous road trips. Let me tell you, the life of a professional wrestler wasn't all it's cut out to be. After busting my ass for years to learn the sport, I now have to travel over frozen lakes in the dead of winter from Indian Reservation to Indian Reservation, bringing my own damn ring, mind you, to bring my skills to people. And what did I get for all this? A few measly bucks? No - experience. That's right. This is all about experience. And this was quite an experience.

For the most part, I'm a pretty laid back guy so it doesn't really matter who I travel with. But it's always nice to have three good friends for these trips, which was how this one was going. One of these friends also happened to be my long time best friend, Jason Reso. Did I say best friend? I meant 'love of my life.' Granted, he didn't know this yet, but I was working on it. Really. I mean, I was wedged into a space of maybe one and a half cubic meters with him, and I wasn't complaining. Was that obvious yet? Or do I need to actually feel him up for him to take a hint? I had a feeling that it was the latter, but I didn't want to scare the hell out of him. I cast him a sideways glance, trying to not be too obvious. He looked so cute, wrapped up in a blanket he'd pulled from his bag since the heat didn't really make it quite past the front seat. He'd offered me half, but I didn't trust myself enough to take him up on it. He was in a chipper mood tonight, as usual, singing off key and trying to entertain us. Even after having his life threatened by Terry and Joe, the smile still hadn't left his face. That had become a standard on these trips. No matter how hard, cold, or painful things got, Jay always had a smile and tried to share it with everyone.

It wasn't that Terry and Joe were really annoyed with Jay, it's just that things were a little stressful right now. We'd been driving on this frozen lake for almost two hours now, and the snow was just starting to slow, returning what little visibility we had at this ungodly hour. It was understandable that Terry was a little edgy. Driving on a frozen lake is quite an experience in and of itself. There are temporary roads built on the ice, but, as ice tends to buckle and break the roads, the roads were almost completely destroyed already. Terry was doing five, ten kilometers an hour, max. And the snow on the road wasn't helping much. There, of course, was the ever present possibility of hitting a weak spot in the ice, but we weren't really worried about that as it was about fifty degrees below. Celsius.

After a moment, I began to wonder how long we'd been driving in silence. Terry was still gripping the wheel as if he held it tighter it would help him drive, Joe was almost asleep, and Jay was... well, Jay was humming _Ninety nine bottles of beer on the wall_. Terry flinched. "I can still hear you, Reso."

Jay stopped abruptly, then smiled at me. I held back a laugh, too, to not piss Terry off further.

"Hey, did'ja hear that?"

Jay and I looked up to Joe, surprised, then to Terry. Terry looked at Joe quickly, then back to the front. "Hear what?"

"That cracking."

As if on cue, the van shifted, as if one of the wheels had sunk through the ice. Jay and I, rather experienced at bailing ship by now, expertly opened the door and jumped out of the van before the other back tire sunk, too. Joe and Terry scrambled after us, and we stood, shocked, watching our van slowly lower into the lake. Jay nodded, accepting the situation, and quietly started singing, "The wheels of the van go through the ice, through the ice, through the -"

And was cut off as Terry smacked him upside the head. "This is not good."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Jay mock saluted. I'm sure that if Terry wasn't beyond stressed out at this point, he would have thrown Jay back in the van and pushed it under himself. Joe and I just stood, dumbfounded, as the van floundered slightly, then settled. The back half had fallen through, but the front was still on the ice. I scratched my head thoughtfully. It was almost four a.m., in the middle of backwoods Manitoba, in the middle of the winter. A tow truck was out of the question. No one would be coming to rescue us anytime soon. Jay moved first, walking halfway around the van, examining the situation. The rest of us stood back and watched him as he skirted the small hole and reached into the van for his parka, then turned back to us. "We can rock this out."

"I know," Terry defended, walking over to the van as if that had been his plan the entire time. He reached in and grabbed a thicker coat as well, and Joe and I followed suit. Once we were fully bundled up, we tried to get things organized. Terry took charge. "Ok, Joe, go try to rock it, we'll push."

Joe got in the van, Jay and I went to either side, and Terry stood behind, all three of us lifting. In retrospect, Jay probably shouldn't have been standing on the side that went though the ice first. But at that point in time, I don't think any of us were thinking too clearly. Joe got in and gunned it, throwing water up at Jay and me. Jay yelled for him to cool it, and we tried again. And that's when it happened. The ice was too thin, the van was too heavy, and when Jay tried to lift, something gave. Namely, the ice. I, of course, couldn't see it, as I was on the other side. I simply heard Jay yell 'fuck,' and Joe stopped spinning his wheels. I let go of the van and ran around the van, sliding to a stop behind Terry. By the time I'd gotten there, Jay was already pushing himself out of the water, but Terry and I helped him nonetheless. He'd fallen in down to his waist, and his clothes were already frozen to his body as we dragged him through the snow away from the van.

"Oh, Jesus Christ, don't die, Jay, don't die!" Terry was almost in tears as we went to work taking off his boots. Joe ran over to us with a look of shock. I just cast him a glance over my shoulder.

"Get a blanket!"

Joe nodded and ran back to the van as I threw off my gloves so I could help Jay get his pants off. His teeth were chattering and he was turning slightly blue. I was running on adrenaline alone, ignoring the cold, and luckily had Jay half undressed as Joe came back with the blanket Jay had been wrapped in earlier. When Jay was as well taken care of as we could manage, I finally took a breath and tried to get a grip on the situation. I held Jay against me, trying to share my body heat. Joe was watching, desperately trying to think of some way to help while Terry was actually crying now, and I think he was praying for Jay.

"Jay?" I whispered.

"Th..that was pr...pretty du..dumb of m..me," he stuttered, flashing me a slight smile. I squeezed him and laughed through tears that were forming in my eyes now. I was suddenly realizing that I could have lost Jay right there. Hell, there was still a chance we could lose him - or he could be permanantly injured - if we didn't do something soon. I looked up to Terry and Joe quickly.

"Get the van out! He needs to get back in there!"

Joe's eyes widened, and he went back immediately. Terry, however, didn't get up. "Don't die, Jay, I'm sorry I was being so mean to you! If you live, I'll let you sing that damn song to me the rest of our lives..."

Jay smiled weakly. "It's fi...fine, yo..you can apologize b..by getting th..the van out."

Terry nodded seriously, got up, and started backing away. "Don't let him die, Adam! Just don't let him die."

I nodded, and Terry went back to the van. I saw the guys struggling with the van and realized that there was no chance in hell we were getting that out of there. There wasn't enough people. If I helped, we might lose Jay, and there was still the possibility of not getting the van out. I sighed, and felt tears in my eyes. They were freezing against my face as soon as they formed and I thought of Jay, then looked down to him. He was smiling softly.

"Do...don't cry, Adam... the te...tears wi..will just freeze on yo..your face..." I smiled at him, then pulled his head to my chest and kissed the top of his head. "I..I'm go..going to be fi..fine..."

"I know," I whispered, lying through my teeth. I looked down to Jay, leaning up against me, his lips blue and his eyes closed. His hands were absently rubbing his legs through the blanket, but it was almost as if he'd given up hope of warming himself up. It hit me hard when I realized that Jay could die out here. He would just go, and I would never have told him what he meant to me. It was so late in the game, I might as well tell him. What could it hurt? The only thing that could help Jay now was an act of God. I didn't even know if he was consciously listening to me. "Jay, I've been wanting to tell you -"

"Look!" Terry called. "It's the other van!"

Remind me to go to church next time I get a chance. Trailing off midsentence, I looked up and saw headlights slowly bumping towards us, then a van pulled up next to ours. Some of the other guys on our tour hopped out and started talking to Terry.

"All right, Jay, time to move." He nodded at me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder as I got up and held him by the waist. With his free hand, he held the blanket and we stumbled over to the other van. One of the guys, Paul, opened the door for us, and I helped Jay into the middle seat. I helped him get situated, then looked him in the eye. "Are you all right?"

"I... yeah, but... st..stay here with me."

I looked up and saw that all the guys who'd arrived in this van were now helping Terry and Joe get the van out, and seemed to be making progress. "Ok."

Crawling over the front seats, I kicked the heater up as high as it would go, then came back and sat next to Jay. He shifted slightly to make room for me, and continued to rub his legs. When I sat down, he looked up to me, solemnly. Even in the dark van, I could see his blue eyes were glossy, and I could tell he was trying to not cry. "I was really scared, Adam."

I put my arms around him again, consolingly and he held onto me, too, shaking slightly. "Me, too, Jay. But you're going to be fine."

"Can you imagine me, after all the shit we've been through, freezing to death in freakin' Manitoba?"

I laughed slightly, despite the fact that he was crying now. I knew they were only tears of anxiety, we'd pulled through the worst parts. "That's not one of the ways I would have expected you to die. I'm sure that we're just going to look back on this later and laugh."

"Yeah," he sniffled slightly, then laughed, too. "I've never seen Terry cry before."

"I think that might be the last time, too." I ran my hand absently through his hair, not realizing what I was doing until I was already doing it. Oh, shit. I had no right to do that. Jay pulled away from me, and I frowned. Damn, busted. I swallowed nervously as he turned and met my glance.

"What did you want to tell me?"

"Oh, um..." Damn nerves. I bit the inside of my lip. "It was nothing."

"Did you think I was going to die? Honestly..."

I sighed. "Well, maybe..."

"So you have something important you can only tell me if I'm dying?" Jay pressed. I hesitated again, and he leaned back against the seat. "Well, I guess at least that means you think I'm going to live now. That's good."

I sighed and looked back to Jay. He was laying his head back on the seat, eyes closed, still rubbing his legs absently, and breathing deeply. The blue tint was fading and the redness that came with cold was returning. He looked so much healthier I could cry. If I was willing to tell him how much he meant to me before, why was I holding back now? "All right, it's just -"

"It's ok, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Jay cut me off lazily. I blinked at him, and he sat up, smiling weakly. I watched him, slackjawed for a moment before he spoke again. "I guess that was kinda intense and might have made you act more than you wanted to."

I suddenly understood where the expression 'tugging on the heartstrings' came from. Jay really was the person I loved, and I was hiding something important from him. I'd known him since sixth grade, we'd had our wild college years together, learned to wrestle together, and our first near death experience together, but I was still afraid to tell him who I really was. When you say it like that, it really seems ridiculous. Fueled with a sudden courage from God only knows where, I kissed him. Lightly, of course, I figured there was no sense in mauling someone who wasn't interested. And as quickly as the courage came, it vanished, and I leaned back in the seat next to Jay, mentally kicking myself.

"Well, I wasn't expecting that."

"I'm so sorry, Jay. I... lost my head. I don't know. I didn't mean anything."

There was dead silence, and I felt a sharp pang of sorrow. Stupid. I'd blown it. Fifteen years of being best friends, completely down the tubes. I'd lost Jay. I knew I was going to, that's why I hadn't told him before. I sighed louder than I intended to.

"I didn't say it was a bad thing."

My eyes jumped open as I felt a cold hand slide over mine, then I turned to look at Jay. He was smiling at me. "You're braver than me, that's for damn sure."

I smiled slightly, then took his hand in both of mine. "You're so cold!"

"I did just involuntarily join the Polar Bear club," Jay deadpanned. "Is that all you have to say?"

Grinning now, I kissed Jay again. He smiled at me, and leaned up against me. "That'll do. Thank you for saving my life."

"I'm not so sure I did all that," I chuckled, wrapping my arms around him.

"Well, I'm going to tell everyone that you did, anyway."

"That'll be my claim to fame when you're a famous wrestler," I grinned, and rested my chin on the top of Jay's head. Jay laughed quietly, and we fell into a peaceful silence. "How're you doing?"

"I'm not dead yet," he quoted. I smiled, and he continued. "No, really, I'm good. I can feel my toes again."

"Good," I said, nodding affirmatively. "'Cause I think they just freed the van."

"Really?" Jay sat up and looked out the window. "Steek. Let's go over there."

I considered that, not sure if Jay should go back outside yet, and not really ready to let him go anyway. "Nah, let's stay here 'til they come and get us."

"And do what -?"

I cut him off with a kiss and let him figure it out from there. 


End file.
